Annoying the Campers
by Lightning Eyed
Summary: The ways that some of my OC's and some familiar faces annoyed the demigods of both Camp Half-blood and Camp Jupiter. Inspired by a friend's story. I know you've seen a lot of these, but I'd like to say mine's different. Rated T for a bit of language and also to be safe. Story-formatted, not just lists. Enjoy!
1. Percy

**A/N: I know this is something that a lot of people do, but I have a few of my own ideas (and some I stole from AthenaOwl10 and modified.) So here goes. This is Malorie's Ways to Annoy the Demigods, Gods, and Other Campers. Also, I do not own any of Percy Jackson, Heroes of Olympus, or the Kane Chronicles.**

Part the First: **PERCY (part one)**

**Ask him if horses speak Chinese.**

"Hey, Percy," Arietta said, walking up to Percy.

"Hay is for horses, Arietta."

"Speaking of horses," Arietta asked, "can they speak Chinese?"

"Speak Chinese? No, they speak horse."

"But if you were Chinese, how would you talk to horses?"

"Because I can speak horse."

"But what if Blackjack was Chinese, then how would you talk to him?"

"All horses speak horse."

Arietta contemplated this a moment and then said, "Neigh."

* * *

><p><strong>Ask him if Tyson ever texts him.<strong>

"Whassup!" screamed Malorie, hanging upside-down from Percy's doorframe.

"Holy moly Malorie! What are you doing up there?"

"I wanted to ask you something."

"Ask away."

"Does Tyson ever text you?"

"I don't even have a phone."

"Not even a shell phone?"

Percy groaned. "No. Demigods aren't supposed to have phones."

"But I have a phone, and Annabeth has a phone, and even Reyna has a phone."

Percy reached for Riptide slowly. Malorie quickly swung down from her perch and ran back to the Apollo cabin.

* * *

><p><strong>Try to drown himInsult his canoeing ability.**

"Hey punk," Clarisse grunted, stepping into the canoe.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm your new canoeing partner, Fish Sticks," she growled. "Wanna see how good I can capsize this thing?"

"Try me," Percy said, grabbing the paddle. Clarisse leaned over in one side of the canoe. Percy sent a wave up her nostrils. Clarisse picked up the paddle and hit him, then paddled like a pro to the center of the lake.

"Where did you learn to canoe like that?"

"Better than you, Fish Sticks? Navy school." Clarisse tipped over the canoe and Percy fell out with a yell. Before he could react, Clarisse grabbed his face and held him underwater. It must have been a full two hours before she let him up.

"You think that's funny?" he said.

"Duh," Clarisse said.

* * *

><p><strong>Replace his jeans with mermaid costumes.<strong>

The sun was hiding behind the camp Half-Blood horizon.

Connor and Travis stuck their periscopes up and watched through the window as Percy woke up, stumbled out of bed like a zombie, and reached for his jeans. Connor stifled his laughter as Percy, still half asleep, grabbed the Halloween costume tail and headed for the bathroom. The Stolls leaned around the side of the Poseidon cabin. A few minutes later, meaning, as soon as the sun was up and therefore the rest of the camp was awake, Percy gave a yell and ran out of the bathroom wearing the tail.

"Nice going," Travis whispered as the whole Aphrodite cabin burst out in a flood of giggles.

"Thanks. Tomorrow, let's replace his camp shirts with shells and seaweed," Connor suggested.

Travis nodded to the cabin just as a very angry Percy stormed out holding a seashell top. "Already did."

Percy looked around the cabin and saw the Stolls.

"Now we run," Connor suggested.

* * *

><p><strong>Force him to watch The Little Mermaid.<strong>

"Movie time," Annabeth announced, cheerfully walking into the Oracle's lair, Logan, Percy, and Will following her.

"Cool, what are we watching?" asked Percy.

Everyone in the room got an evil glint in their eyes. Rachel reached into her movie cupboard and produced a DVD.

"Oh, no no no," Percy said, backing away. "I refuse to watch that."

Ten minutes later, _The Little Mermaid _was playing on Rachel's screen and Percy was duct-taped into his chair.

"So are you two Facebook friends?" Logan asked.

"What? Who?" Percy asked.

"You and Ariel."

"What? No! She doesn't exist!"

"How about Ursula?"

"NO."

"Amphitrite?"

"Gods damn it."

"You are?"

"_NO!_"

**I know there are lots more, but for now I'm doing five per chapter. Hope you enjoyed this. I'm doing Annabeth next. I'll try to update this daily.**


	2. Annabeth

Part the Second: **ANNABETH**

* * *

><p><strong>Give her a book on spiders.<strong>

Annabeth hugged Travis and Malcolm, leaving them blushing. "Thanks for the birthday present."

"So open it," Travis cheered.

Annabeth warily peeled off the wrapping paper.

"Spiders and Tarantulas," Annabeth read. "Seriously? You two bought me a book about spiders?"

"Yeah," Malcolm said, being the only Athena child not afraid of the eight-legged crawlers. "It might help your arachnophobia."

"Especially the pictures," Travis suggested. Annabeth flipped open the book to find an image of a hand-sized tarantula and then shot him a death glare.

"Bye," he said, dashing out the door, Annabeth on his heels with her knife.

* * *

><p><strong>Doodle Percy's name all over her blueprints.<strong>

"Shh," Katie told Megan, grabbing the blueprint pen and uncapping it silently. Annabeth was fast asleep in her bunk.

Megan grabbed a second pen and picked the lock on Annabeth's diary, pointing to where she had written Percy's name in hearts and swirls.

Katie and Megan shot each other a glance, each took a blueprint, and copied the signature all over them. Brianna stirred for two seconds before falling back asleep. Annabeth was still out cold.

After they had written Percy's name on most of the blueprints, they recapped the markers. Megan stopped to pick up a dead spider from the cabin floor and place it on Brianna's nose, then they left.

The next morning, Annabeth woke up and groaned in annoyance. "That's the third time I've fallen half asleep and written his name on my blueprints," she muttered. Brianna stirred and looked at her, not noticing the dead spider stuck to her nose.

"What's wrong?" Brianna asked at the stare Annabeth gave her.

"SPIDER!" Annabeth screamed, running out of the cabin.

"Do you usually leave your diary unlocked?" called Brianna.

"Oh, owl pellets," Annabeth cursed.

* * *

><p><strong>Burn her books in the sing-along fire.<strong>

As the campers finished their song, Drew reached out her hands. Lydia each dropped a thick architecture book into them, then picked up one more. The two Aphrodite daughters dumped the books into the blazing fire.

Annabeth, chatting with Piper right behind them, looked at Drew and Lydia, then at the fire. "Are you two burning books? That's disrespectful." Then she noticed Spiders and Tarantulas at their feet. "Hey, those are my books! Give them back!"

Drew and Lydia exchanged glances; deciding charmspeaking wasn't so good in this situation, they bolted.

* * *

><p><strong>Buy her a bucket of fake spiders. Or real ones.<strong>

Annabeth was the first one to notice the bucket in the middle of the Athena Cabin floor. "Huh," she said. "What's- SPIDER!"

Malcolm dragged himself out of his bunk and glanced at the bucket. "Annabeth, they're fake. Come on, let's go to breakfast." He smiled evilly when she turned her back.

Annabeth sighed, got dressed, grabbed her hat, and left the cabin.

She had no sooner stepped through the door than the old water-bucket prank was pulled on her. Except instead of cold water, the bucket was filled with… you guessed it- spiders.

"MALCOLM!" Annabeth yelled.

He said nothing, just picked up a tarantula, held it out, and said, "Hungry?"

"I am so not making you deputy next year," she grumbled.

* * *

><p><strong>Steal her homework. Fill in answers you know are wrong.<strong>

Arietta grabbed Annabeth's AP Calculus homework when her back was turned. "So see you again next week?" she said, stuffing the papers under her shirt.

Annabeth nodded and Arietta walked out the door. As soon as she got back to the Hecate cabin she called, "Lou Ellen! Want to have some fun?"

The two of them split the ten-page packet. Arietta pulled out her wand, pointed it at the paper, and said, "Numero Confundus."

At midnight the two slid the worksheets back onto the table and ran back to Cabin Sixteen before the harpies could catch them.

At the crack of dawn Annabeth got up to check her homework.

"WHO MESSED UP MY CALCULUS WORKSHEETS!" the voice rang through the camp.

Arietta and Lou Ellen looked at each other and smiled.

**So did you enjoy how we enjoyed Annabeth? Review! And guess who I'm doing next... (drumroll) REYNA.**


	3. Reyna

**Disclaimer: I don't own PJO, HoO, Amazon, the Kindle, or Angry Birds. **

Part the Third: **REYNA.**

* * *

><p><strong>Lie loudly when she's walking her dogs.<strong>

Reyna strolled down the _Via Principalis_ with her two metal dogs on leashes.

"I'm a daughter of Jupiter," Megan said loudly. Reyna didn't hear, but Aurum sure did. The golden dog growled and took off, nearly yanking Reyna's arm from its socket.

"Ouch! What has got into you?" Reyna asked the dog.

"I'm a _probatio,"_ Percy whispered from the other side of the Via. Argentum, the silver greyhound, leaped at him at a hundred miles an hour.

"Pluto's pomegranates!" Reyna exclaimed. "Sugar rushes much?"

"I was born in 1904," Hazel said, on top of the chariot dealership roof, "and I own a computer chain."

Both dogs rushed Hazel, who lay down on the roof so Reyna couldn't see her. They barked at it for two minutes straight after dragging Reyna across the road.

"Do I need to take you to the vet?" Reyna yelled. Both of the dogs innocently looked at her.

"Oh, don't give me that," she told them, not hearing Gwen say, "I go to Hogwarts," from the other side of the street again. Argentum charged her. Aurum, realizing he was a bit late, wove the leash around Reyna's legs and dove at Gwen. Reyna tripped over the leash and spewed a few curses in Latin.

* * *

><p><strong>Order large amounts of Amazon products. Pay for them with Hazel's cursed treasures.<strong>

Lydia walked into the Camp Jupiter mail offices. "Is my Kindle here yet?" she asked.

"No," Reyna answered.

"How about the huge pile of books?"

"No."

"My pegasus?"

"Your what?"

"Stuff I ordered from Amazon," Lydia explained. "What about my jewelry?"

"You're going to put Hylla on overflow," Reyna muttered under her breath.

"Or my chariot? Or my-"

"NO!" Reyna yelled, suddenly realizing there were tons of boxes with the Amazon arrow on them. "Holy Jupiter," she muttered. "How did you afford all that?"

"From Hazel's Christmas presents," Lydia explained.

Reyna turned white and fell over.

* * *

><p><strong>Take Skippy for joyrides.<strong>

"This is fun," Frank said from Guido's back.

"Isn't it?" Percy yelled from Blackjack.

"Totally," Reyna called from Porkpie.

_Wait. I'm riding Porkpie? Where's Skippy?_

"WAHOO!" Hazel screamed, flying loop-de-loops on Skippy directly above Reyna.

"That little…" Reyna maneuvered Porkpie fighter-jet style, directly behind Hazel.

Finally the daughter of Pluto heard the wing beats behind her.

"Oh, unicorn poo," she grumbled, sending Skippy and herself into a steep dive, closely followed by Reyna. But something told Hazel this little joyride wasn't over.

* * *

><p><strong>Mistake her for a centurion.<strong>

Reyna adjusted her praetor's cape and walked down the First Cohort's ranks, inspecting their armor.

"Probatio Davis," she said, picking out Maddie. "Fix your sword belt."

"Yes, Centurion," Maddie said. Reyna moved on to Octavian and then turned back to Maddie. "'Centurion?'"

"Praetor," Maddie corrected.

"Octavian, put away the teddy bear. Honestly."

"Yes, Centurion," he replied.

"Praetor," Reyna corrected, not being so lenient but instead sticking her gladius under his chin.

"Praetor," he squeaked out.

"You have excellent posture, Annabeth. At least, for a_ graecus _you do_._"

"Thank you, Centurion," Annabeth answered.

"PRAETOR!" Reyna yelled, finally fed up.

* * *

><p><strong>Invite her sister to camp functions. Tell her she can sell Kindles.<strong>

"Hi, Hylla," Annabeth said into the phone.

"Hi, Annabeth," Hylla answered.

"You should come to the chariot race today. And stay for the Senate meeting and the gladiator fights."

"I will. By the way, how's your Kindle working out?"

"Excellently," Annabeth said, trying to conceal her evil smile. "Why don't you sell some while you're here?"

An hour later, Hylla and about ten of the Amazons marched up to the city limits.

"Haaaaaai, Terminus," she said, handing over a large assortment of concealed weapons and a Kindle Fire.

"Cool," he said, picking up the Kindle. "What's this?"

"It's a Kindle Fire. An e-reader. You can play Angry Birds on it, too."

"What's Angry Birds?"

"It's a game. A guaranteed boredom buster. Here, I'll show you."

Eight hours and twenty-nine Kindles later, Hylla bid her exasperated sister farewell.

* * *

><p><strong>Ahhh, I love annoying Reyna. Next I'll be doing Thalia! Review!<strong>


	4. Thalia

**Disclaimer: You know I don't own the books. Or Barbie. Or Justin Bieber or Rebecca Black (thank the gods!) Or Pokemon.**

Part the Fourth: **THALIA.**

* * *

><p><strong>Plant Barbies in her room.<strong>

Phoebe, Malorie, and Liz pulled the packaging off the last doll. _Deluxe Pink Fairy Princess Barbie,_ read the box. Malorie picked up a hideously dressed doll in a pink dress covered in bows, as well as Mermaid Princess Christie. Phoebe was armed with Flutter Purple Pixie Kelly and Malibu Ken. And Liz held the prize of all- a Barbie made to look like Thalia, with short black hair, blue eyes, jeans they had torn with a hunting knife, a black shirt that read DEATH TO ME and a Hannah Montana Barbie red leather jacket.

Phoebe tied Deluxe Pink Fairy Princess Barbie to the ceiling above Thalia's bunk. Malorie sat Mermaid Princess Christie in the Hunters' bathroom. Flutter Purple Pixie Kelly sat on the doorknob. Malibu Ken lay on Thalia's lieutenant's bow. Thalia Barbie was placed in the lieutenant's quiver, so that it wouldn't be noticed until tonight's capture the flag game. The packaging was hauled out to the Dumpster and Phoebe, Malorie, and Liz returned to their beds.

Two minutes later the alarm went off. Thalia went through her normal routine. Smack the snooze button. Stare at the ceiling.

See Deluxe Pink Fairy Princess Barbie. Scream.

Make her way to the bathroom to shower.

See Mermaid Princess Christie. Scream again. Stab it.

Grab her bow for the day.

See Malibu Ken. Growl and rip off its head.

Yell at everyone to wake up then go to the door and open it to get a breeze coming through.

See Flutter Purple Pixie Kelly. Shoot it.

That night at Capture the Flag, Thalia reached for another arrow. Seeing the clonie Barbie, she yelled, "YOU THREE!"

Phoebe, Malorie, and Aria were grateful that they could run like the wind just then.

* * *

><p><strong>Switch out her rock CD's for Hannah Montana.<strong>

"Shhhhh!" Will emphasized. "You call yourself one of the camp pranksters?"

"Because I can run fast," Connor told him, pulling the first Hannah Montana album from his bag and popping the disc out. He and Will quickly replaced all her music- Hannah Montana for Green Day, Katy Perry for Aerosmith, Lucy Hale for Nickelback, Justin Bieber for My Chemical Romance. Then they made the best switch of all- stealing her AC/DC and putting in Rebecca Black.

She awoke the next morning and hit Play on her 6-disc changer.

_You got the limo out front-_

Thalia changed the disc.

_The summer after high school when we first met-_

Disc change.

_Hold on 'coz I'm letting go, I'm gonna lasso your heart like a rodeo-_

Change and change again.

_See I never thought that I could walk through fire-_

Thalia was getting ticked.

_Seven a.m. waking up in the morning, Gotta be fresh gotta go downstairs…_

"WHAT THE HELL!" Thalia blurted. "Who switched my good music for female popstars?"

"Justin Bieber isn't female," Connor said from under the bed.

"He might as well be," Thalia muttered. "Hold up…"

She looked directly at Connor, leaning over and staring at his face.

"Oh gods," Connor and Will said in unison, scrambling out from under the bed.

_-It's Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday-_

"IT'S SATURDAY!" Thalia bellowed at the CD player, which surprisingly turned off. Then she grabbed her hunting knife and ran after Connor and Will, who darted into the boys' bathroom.

Thalia buried her head in her hands. Facepalm moments indeed.

_-Partyin, partyin yeah, partyin, partyin yeah, fun fun fun fun-_

* * *

><p><strong>Request flying lessons.<strong>

"Heeey Thalia," Lydia said, sneaking up behind her.

"What do you want, Aphrodite spawn?"

"Do you give flying lessons?"

"Why would I give flying lessons? I can't even fly."

"But your brother can fly."

"Lydia. The answer is NO."

* * *

><p><strong>Call her Pikachu.<strong>

Thalia and Percy were facing off in the sword arena.

"Go, Pikachu, go!" called Arietta.

"What did you just call me?" Thalia's eyes flashed dangerously.

"She called you Pikachu," Percy said, holding back his laughter.

"I'll 'Pikachu' you," Thalia grumbled. Then, holding up her sword and focusing her energy the way Jason had taught her…

"PI-KA-CHUUUUU!"

A huge bolt of lightning arced out of the sky and struck Arietta, Percy, and anyone else who had tried the nickname.

"Someone needs to get this chick a Poké Ball," Travis said, whistling.

* * *

><p><strong>Make fun of her fear of heights.<strong>

"Too chicken?" Megan taunted from the top of the wall. "Afraid your daddy is going to blast you off the rock?"

Thalia growled.

"You're what, nineteen?"

Her fingers flickered.

"Oh come on. You play Angry Birds, the birds aren't scared of heights."

"Even Nico isn't scared of heights."

"Even PERCY isn't."

That was the last straw. Megan and Brianna put up their lightning rods before Thalia could zap them.

"I will get you sometime," Thalia promised.

"You could help us annoy Luke," Brainna suggested.

* * *

><p><strong>You heard Brianna, next chapter we'll be annoying Luke!<strong>


	5. Luke

**I definitely do not own any of the following: Percy Jackson, Clorox, Swiffer, Conair, Scuunci, or Star Wars.**

Part the Fifth: **LUKE. (supposing he was still alive and at camp.)**

* * *

><p><strong>Wipe down everything he touches.<strong>

"Hey Annabeth," Luke said, sitting on her desk.

"Hi," she said, ignoring him and continuing to work on her blueprints.

After twenty minutes he got bored and stood up. Annabeth pulled a Clorox wipe from a tube on her desk and wiped the spot he was just sitting on. After he left the cabin, Malcolm and Brianna swiped the floor he had walked on with a Swiffer.

"Life's always better when you don't have Luke germs around," Malcolm commented.

* * *

><p><strong>Use a blue plastic hairbrush. On him.<strong>

"Hiya Luke," Rachel said, brushing her hair with _the brush._ Malorie and Megan pulled out their own blue brushes- one Conair and one Scuunci, and brushed their hair.

"My eye still hurts," Luke complained at the sight of the brushes.

"Gee, this feels good on my hair," Rachel said loudly.

"It's making it so straight," Malorie added.

"So shiny," Megan commented.

"Are you sure you don't need a hairstylist?" Rachel suggested.

"Absolutely sure," Luke said, backing away.

* * *

><p><strong>Tip Hermes to annoy his own son. Star Wars style.<strong>

"Promise?" Arietta said, holding the drachma away from Hermes.

"Fine. I promise."

Twenty minutes later, Hermes was outfitted in a Darth Vader costume and his caduceus was in lightsaber form. He hid in the closet in his cabin.

Luke opened the closet door to put away his flying sneakers (which somehow came up out of Tartarus) and Hermes popped out and said, "Luke, I am your father!"

* * *

><p><strong>Steal his stuff. By fishing through the window.<strong>

Percy cast the fishing rod in the Hermes cabin window.

"You're sure this will work?" asked Leo and Logan at the exact same time.

"Dude, if I wasn't would I be doing it?" Percy asked. "Trust me."

Percy moved the rod around a bit and reeled it in. A pair of Luke's underwear (clean, thank the gods) were on the hook at the end.

"Nice," Leo said. "How much does he spend on these things? And can I keep them?"

"No," Logan said, fishing in a diary. "Wait… he keeps a diary?"

"Let's give it to Connor and Travis," suggested Percy.

Leo cast the line and came up with a Mythomagic figure.

"Hey, look, it's Demeter," commented Percy. "I wonder if he has a crush?"

Percy went fishing again and found one of Luke's flying shoes. "Ugh. Bad memories."

"Enjoying my stuff?" Luke asked as Logan reeled in a little mini lightning bolt. "And who's the lightning thief now… Logan?"

The three boys took off and only stopped when they were safe inside Bunker 9.

* * *

><p><strong>Accuse him of being Luke Skywalker.<strong>

Maxine finished her upload of the Star Wars theme song onto her iPod. "Got your speakers, Thalia?"

Thalia plugged the speakers into the iPod. "Let's go annoy my ex best-friend," she said with an evil grin. "Phoebe, how's that being a guy thing coming?"

The rest of the Hunters slipped on their Storm Trooper masks and grabbed their bows- in blaster-gun form. Maxine curled her braids into Leia-style balls. Thalia put on her Chewbacca suit. Phoebe pinned on her Han Solo wig.

Luke was sitting on the bench next to the basketball court playing with his cell phone. Maxine, Thalia, and Phoebe approached him. Maxine hit play on the iPod.

Ten minutes later the whole lot of the Hunters was cracking up in their cabin and Luke was seriously considering re-watching Star Wars to make sure he wasn't actually the main character.

* * *

><p><strong>I apologize for the large amount of Star Wars references in this chapter. But wait for the next one… NICO.<strong>


	6. Nico

**Time to annoy the living (dead?) CRAP out of Nico! I don't own PJO, Adam and Andrew, The Emo Song, Sleeping Beauty, Adventure Time, Victoria's Secret, or Snape.**

Part the Sixth: **NICO.**

* * *

><p><strong>Teach everyone "The Emo Song" so they can sing it to him.<strong>

"That's Thalia, Annabeth, Jason, you, and Miranda down, so we have two hundred sixty-four campers to go at Camp Half-Blood alone," Arietta said to Lou Ellen, checking the names off the list.

Nico walked into the Hecate cabin and interrupted Arietta and Lou Ellen's meeting. The two Hecate kids looked at each other and then started belting out "The Emo Song."

"_I'm an emo kid, non-conforming as can be_

_You'd be non-conforming too if you looked just like me_

_I have paint on my nails and make-up on my face_

_I'm almost emo enough to__start__shaving my legs_

_'Cause I feel real deep when I'm dressing in drag_

_I call it freedom of expression,most just call me a fag."_

"Gods damn it!" Nico yelled. "First Annabeth and then Miranda and now you two!"

Arietta and Lou Ellen both reached for their wands.

* * *

><p><strong>Pink out.<strong>

Thalia pulled on the dress she was wearing. "Remind me why in Tartarus I am wearing this again?"

"To bother Nico," Phoebe cheered, pulling on a Sleeping Beauty costume.

"At least you're girls," Jason said, coming in dressed in a magenta Prince Gumball outfit and accompanied by Piper dressed as the Bubble Gum Princess Bonnibel.

"You gave the pink hairdye to the Stolls?" Malorie asked.

"Of course."

"And the pink paint and instructions to the Ares cabin?"

"Yep."

"And the pink poodle to Reyna and Hazel?"

"Of course."

At five o' clock the next morning, everyone at Camp Half-Blood, including the Roman guests, was outfitted completely in pink. Washable pink paint graffiti, courtesy of the Ares cabin, covered every one of the cabins. Everyone was coming out of the shower with their hair accidentally dyed pink, unless they hadn't used shampoo or were bald. Reyna and Hazel were walking dogs together- Reyna held Argentum and Aurum on pink leashes and in pink tutus, and Hazel walked a pink poodle while dressed in a Barbie outfit. Nico's alarm clock went off and he tumbled out of bed. He buzzed through his normal morning routine (as much as a child of the dead can 'buzz.') Finally, at 5:24 he opened the door, saw the world of pink, and SCREAMED.

* * *

><p><strong>Leave his Hades Mythomagic figure in plain sight.<strong>

"Dammit," Nico muttered, noticing the figurine of his dad. "I thought I hid this thing deep in my cupboard." He put it in the cupboard and headed off to breakfast. Connor and Brianna snuck into the cabin and replaced the figurine.

After a whole day of the statue return to his bedside table, Nico was too irritated to put it back in the cupboard. He left it where it was. As soon as he fell asleep, Connor and Brianna re-entered his cabin and put it on his face.

* * *

><p><strong>Tell Persephone to control where he shadow-travels to.<strong>

"Hey Persephone," Malorie said. "We were wondering if you could help with something."

"What?"

"We want to prank Nico…" Hazel said and spilled out the plan.

Now was the critical moment. Either Persephone would help or she would blast the two of them to bits.

"I'll do it," she said. "But I get to pick where he goes.

Back at Camp Half-Blood, Nico stepped into the tree, intending to visit his father. Instead, with Persephone's ever-so-cruel sense of humor, he shadow-traveled directly into-

"YOU LITTLE PERV!" Phoebe screamed, chasing Nico with her bow drawn, dressed in a towel. Hazel, Malorie, and Persephone, watching from an Iris-message, cracked up. Nico tried again. This time he went to-

"What are you doing in my house!" Annabeth shrieked. "Gods, Nico! You could have knocked!"

"One more time?" Hazel pleaded.

"Alright."

Nico made one more attempt and shadow-traveled DIRECTLY into the changing room of Victoria's Secret.

With Reyna.

"HOLY JUPITER!" she screamed. Fortunately she was still wearing her jeans and trying on a bra, but Nico found himself chased out of the mall by two snarling metal greyhounds.

He stepped into a tree and walked through to the Underworld. Persephone, Malorie, and Hazel were still having a giggle-fest.

"What was that for?" Nico yelled.

"Run, you two," Persephone suggested.

"Do it on them," Nico suggested as Hazel and Malorie were just about to shadow-travel away.

And so Hazel and Malorie traveled directly to the Hephaestus TV studio. Onstage. And guess who was having an interview?

Hades.

Oh, crap.

"Hi dad," Hazel said, in that tone of voice that said, 'I know I'm in trouble.'

* * *

><p><strong>Call him Snape.<strong>

"Hi, Snape," Logan said, walking past Nico.

"What?" Nico asked.

"I said, hi, Snape," Logan answered.

"I'm not Snape though.

"I know. But you're black haired and have pale skin and hate everyone and have a big nose and-"

Logan decided to stop there before Nico summoned up a skeletal army.

* * *

><p><strong>Are you finding this enjoyable? Review and stuff! Next up we'll be doing Rachel (ooh, this oughtta be fun.)<strong>


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